Laugh and the world laughs with you.
Cry and you cry with your girlfriends.
Thirty-five is when you finally get
your head together and your body
starts falling apart.
Inside every older person is a younger
person -- wondering what the hell happened.
-Cora Harvey Armstrong-
The hardest years in life are
those between ten and seventy.
-Helen Hayes (at 73)-
When I was young, I was put in a
school for retarded kids for two years
before they realized I actually had a
hearing loss. And they called ME slow!
Things are going to get a lot worse
before they get worse.
My second favorite household chore
is ironing. My first being, hitting my
head on the top bunk bed until I faint.
Old age ain't no place for sissies.
I have yet to hear a man ask for
advice on how to combine marriage
and a career.
I am a marvelous housekeeper.
Every time I leave a man I keep his house.
-Zsa Zsa Gabor-
Every time I close the door on reality
it comes in through the windows.
I'm not going to vacuum 'til Sears
makes one you can ride on.
I try to take one day at a time, but
sometimes several days attack me
If you can't be a good example, then
you'll just have to be a horrible warning.
I refuse to think of them as chin
hairs. I think of them as stray eyebrows.
I'm not offended by all the dumb blonde
jokes because I know I'm not
dumb ... and I'm also not blonde.
If high heels were so wonderful, men
would still be wearing them.
When women are depressed they
either eat or go shopping.
Men invade another country.
Nobody can make you feel inferior
without your permission.
The phrase "working mother"